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Monday, March 22, 2004

It's Time 

Now I'm mad. At myself. Something is going to have to change.

I have a doctors appointment this morning, they want to run some more tests - no big deal. OK - reading the instructions it says No Hot or Cold Beverages 1 hour prior. Shoot - better start guzzling. Wait, what's this? No Smoking 2 hours prior! No Coffee or Cigarettes!?! Are they crazy!!!

So, of course I feel the need to jam in as much of both of those items into my system as quickly as possible. Shoot - that was my last Misty. Oh that's alright, I can get by until after the test. Man, I really want a cigarette, just one more to go with this coffee. I'll run to the store after I post today's stuff. I can wait.

I just got back from running to the store. I couldn't do it. That Makes Me Mad at Me. This has got to stop. NOTHING should have that kind of power over me.

So, here's the plan - I'm setting a date of April 1 (appropriate don't you think) to quit smoking. I've tried before, but have never been this mad at myself. Plus I know it's not good for me at all. I love to work out and this makes the cardio part that much tougher.

I think I'll try that Zyban. I hear it really helps the urges and keeps the moods steady. That is my main concern. I don't need to be flying off the handle with my customers while I'm trying to improve the quality of my life. Unemployment is not considered an improvement in most cases.

So-there it is. It's in writing and now I'm bound to do it. It's past time.


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My "Other" Family - Fizzen Sparks