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Sunday, April 18, 2004

Value Added 

This is my philosophy of relationships.

They have to be value added. There has to be something of value flowing both ways. A positive exchange.

Often, over the course of time, people and situations change. That means relationships can change. If we don't pay attention we get into a rut and start to lose some of the value. It's seen in taking things and people for granted, not paying attention to the details. It's the little things.

I have a process I like to call Red Tide. Every once in a while I review my relationships. Am I adding any value to this person's life? What am I bringing to the table here? Are they adding value to my life? Or is everything a one way street (that one way can be in either direction). If the answer is a negative - then adjust or cut your loses.

Sounds kind of cold doesn't it? But actually, it's a way of keeping balance in your life. We are all so busy and there are many demands on our time, emotions and attention. If you have a relationship that is not helping in that balance by adding something wonderful to the mix - do you really want to continue expending all that energy on it?

Please don't misunderstand me - I'm not talking about the rough times we all go through, where we really need to vent and pull into ourselves for what ever reason. I'm talking long term. If in the course of a year there has been no value sharing then something is wrong, out of kilter so to speak.

I'd be interested to hear how you all deal with this. Maybe I am being close minded or cold. I'm open to new ideas!


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My "Other" Family - Fizzen Sparks