Friday, May 21, 2004
I have a theory (of course I do!). It's simple. It's fear.
Fear of failure, fear of commitment, fear of having something to lose, fear of feelings. Yep - it's all about fear.
I've already talked about that personal type of fear that causes us to pause in pursuit of our own potential. Now I'm going to deal with that fear that causes us to hurt those around us.
When you've been hurt in life, by someone else or by your own decisions, it tends to make you cautious. That can be a good thing. We have to learn from our mistakes or that is a waste of action. However, you can't let that fear paralyze you or cause you to turn on those around you.
I'm starting a post about expectations. The bottom line is that in many situations, expectations are actually self prophesies. If you expect it, that's what you get. If you just start out thinking someone will hurt you - you know what, they probably will. Because you are looking for it. You expect it.
If you start out thinking you will fail, you know what? You probably will. You expect to so you don't really focus on how not too - you're to busy looking for the signs that you are failing.
I don't function that way. I expect truth, honor, respect. And most of the time I get it. When I don't I'm always surprised.
I would never brush someone off. I would never "play" someone. I would never stand them up. I would never tell them something just because I think it's what they want to hear. I don't like it when people treat me that way. Not One Little Bit.
OK - you've probably picked up that I'm dealing with a bit of crap right now. All I know is that the timing is pretty lousy and it's about the last thing that I need at this point in my life. So - all gone, bye bye. I told a friend of mine today that if someone treated a friend of mine the way I've been treated I'd be kickin' some major ass and not giving any slack. Well, you know what. Someone IS treating a friend of mine that way. ME. I'm not going to allow anyone to treat me in a way that I would not allow them to treat my friends.
SO - suffice it to say, this is the beginning of the ass kickin'. And - I'll have my say. Not now, not tomorrow. But I will have my say. Stay tuned - I'll be sharing the results when I finally do. Believe me - when I put my mind to a good "settin' down" it's a work of art!